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October 1, 2014

UNMASKED

By Angela Beeler

mask

People are intrigued by perfect lives…but changed by messy ones.

A few months ago, we challenged readers to share their scandalous stories as a proclamation of fearLESSness. Many of you shared some pretty bold stories, and it occurred to me that perhaps many of us are living our lives behind the lies we create. I can only imagine that, much like my own scandalous story, the attempt to display a neatly packaged, put together life is – for some of us – a bigger goal than displaying a life that is REAL.

So let me stand on my soap box once again and repeat: People are intrigued by perfect lives…but changed by messy ones.  The idea that our “real” can  impact the lives of others in a way that ushers in change...or understanding...or acceptance...or authenticity is an idea WORTH pursuing.  Do you want your life to intrigue people...or change them?  It's your choice.

This month, we’re launching a social media campaign called #UNMASKED. We’ll be sharing stories about women who have chosen to take their masks off and live openly and authentically before others. We’ll talk about the freedom they experienced, but also the hardships – because there’s a price to pay for freedom, yes?

In a season devoted to costumes, dress ups, and masks…we’ve decided to un-mask. We ask you to think about the masks you put on: the perfect mommy mask, the happy-all-the-time mask, the magical marriage mask, the wonderful wife mask, the well-behaved children mask, the ministry mask, the social media mask. Are you exhausted just reading the list? I am.

I'm also exhausted because I've lived behind the mask.  Back when blogging wasn't yet a "thing" I shared a lot of my parenting journey on a blog called "Adventures of a Supermom."  I blogged from 2007 -2009, and I distinctly remember the turning point in my blog writing.  I was re-reading my entries (as many bloggers do but won't admit) and I thought to myself:  "is what I'm writing even true?"   My own blog posts were filled with stories about the joys of mommyhood, babies who never fussed or had temper tantrums, my never-ending patience and magical mealtime moments.  And as I read these posts I realized it was fabricated.  All of it.  I didn't love every facet of mommyhood.  I operated with negative 4 patience.  My babies fussed.  And threw temper tantrums.  All The Freaking Time.  Mealtime wasn't magical.  It was mayhem.  And I decided that as much as I wanted to convey that I was a good mom -- it was more important for me to convey that I was a STRUGGLING mom.  I started writing about my lonely days.  I wrote about my PMS days.  I wrote about parenting an odd child.  I wrote about ME.  I wrote about the REAL struggles of my life as a stay-at-home mom.  And you know what?  It was liberating.  It was freedom.  It was MUCH easier than pretending that I loved every moment of mommyhood.  Because I didn't.

I wrote to give voice to those suffocated by their masks, and to keep from being suffocated by my own.

So this month our goal is to keep it real -- Real life. Real struggles. Real journeys. Real faith. Real Jesus. And in the end, we hope you’ll be changed, not just intrigued, by the unmasked faces you’ll meet this month.

 

2 COMMENTS

Sarah

9 years ago

I slept almost all day with a yucky stomach bug, now wide awake and catching up on my internet reads. Holy cow Angela--your mommy blog. Don't demonize it--it is an awesome piece of history! A treasure that you and your girls will one day cherish. I resonate with the -4 patience part. Being a mom is HARD, HOLY work. Laying our lives down for them. I try to remember that it's a short season in light of life and I get one shot. That helps, most days. And when it doesn't, I turn to chocolate and take a 3 hour nap when the baby does. Self care at it's finest. And now I've externally processed all over your blog--see what happens when I get a day to myself to think clearly? :) We learned in one of the kid's history lessons last year that the word "hypocrite" originated with Greek hypokritēs actors who wore masks. This series will be great fodder for our time of encouragement at the end of class, thank you for that and for the encouragement! And now my wide-awake self is off to creep on your life 7 years ago. Bless. xo

Michelle

9 years ago

Hi Angela- I almost wrote about my scandalous story back a few weeks ago but then I got busy, and side tracked, and forgot. I was asked by a church to come and share my testimony so I sat down and wrote out my scandal and rewrote it and rewrote it until it felt like what I was saying was the right blend of truth and hope. I got up there and I told my story. It was the most liberating thing because it wasn't pretty, but it was honest. And God was in it. One of the biggest outcomes of my scandalous mess is the intimacy I have with Jesus, who had to pick me up out of the dirt and set me on the Rock. I give Him the glory because of the mess. A perfect story just doesn't have the same weight. It doesn't drive you to secret places that you didn't know existed! Messy stories do :). I can't wait to see how your #unmasked campaign turns out! To God be the glory! Much love :)

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